The World seems to change at the age of 29. The doors are shut at your face, the walls seem to close upon on you and your choices get fewer. It feels as if a draught has just touched upon you. Welcome to your Saturn Return.
Saturn Return technically means a certain period of time when Saturn returns to the place where he was at the very hour of your birth. Saturn is a slow planet and his cycle around the Sun takes 29 years. In example, someone who has Saturn at 5 degrees of Aquarius in her chart will experience their first Saturn return in 2021 when Saturn arrives at 5 degrees of Aquarius. We experience the second Saturn return 29 years later in a hopefully more mature age.
What does it mean for you ? Arrival of Saturn means that the first phase of your life is over. Saturn is the Lord of Time and he marks endings and beginnings. Yes, as you already know, every ending is a new beginning. If you are approaching your Saturn return (transiting Saturn is somehow close to your natal Saturn but not conjunct yet), you are now in a balsamic phase: perhaps a little depressed, closing up your life so far. Ages 28-29 are a big cleaning time. For some of us our friends circle change, some leave behind their careers and don’t know what to do next and some end their once-fairy-tale relationships that repeat their childhood patterns of abandonment, shame and self-betrayal.
Why do we go through such tribulances at 28 ? This is the time we face the reality of the world and heaviness of matter. One of those realities in life is our own power. Saturn return does not feel like it at first but this is the time when we find our own power and place in the world by going through Emptiness, Darkness, humiliation, patience and hard work.
At first, prior to your first Saturn return you get ripped off of your life. Everything you have so far buişt collapses, a big cleaning and clearing happens in your life. Sometimes people get depressed prior to their Saturn return so that they leave the world, turn inwards and re-emerge with newfound energy. The world and people may be cruel to you during your Saturn return. Many people you meet at this time may reflect the light of Saturn. Some may demand you to be more disiciplined, hardworking and productive. While some will teach and show you how to be better structured, methodological and professional. Grab these opportunities well, because what you learn and what you do during this time – even in small portions – will grow and flourish well into your next 29 years.
What I always tell my clients is: “do not settle”. Many go through hardship, rejection and lack during the Saturn return. This may end up in a lowered self esteem, a rather unsure attitude towards life. Some end up underemployed, and paid in crumbs. Life throws those quests at us to test our mettle and see what we are made of. This is specially true for the Saturn return.
How was my own Saturn return ? It was may years ago. I was the happiest woman at 27, travelling around Europe, tasting every cheesecake and marcipan dessert, studying, doing my internship, learning languages, going to every museum, opera and concert… Then, things did not go as planned. I found myself suffering a minor depression at home in Istanbul. I was hunting for jobs, still making plans to expand my world but no avail. Everthing stopped as if my life has come to an end but I was physically alive. I became depressed, lonely, mute and desperate. I became an excellent role player at Lord of the Rings Online. I did not know what to do next and the world seemed to be in a horrible chaos.
Saturn’s approaching steps change our perception and we beign to see the world as a dark and murky place. We are asked to make the most of very little things. We are asked to redefine boundaries, swipe away bullies, and sometimes deal with psycho-narscissistic corporate junkies. On the same token we get trained on time management, routines and mentored in creating structure and discipline in our lives. This rather painful time is when we get a new quest. Saturn bestows a new purpose upon us and then it is up to us to work steadily on this purpose and succeed or not. We get a short feedback 3,5 years later and a more Saturnine, solid outcome of our actions appear after 7 years.
Whatever happens during your Saturn return, take the hard path. No shortcuts, no sugarcoating. Be completely honest with yourself and be sure that you do not unsee a thing. You are made for these times. Let The Great Blacksmith, Maker of the World melt you in the infernal fires, beat you between his hammer and his anvil, bathe you in ice cold waters and reveal what you truly are through his divine art.